Because of That Sleep

It was after Sunday Mass, and some members of the Legion of Mary were heading somewhere together in a car. The topic of conversation in the car was the World Cup, in which the Korean team had regrettably been eliminated in the quarterfinals, followed by that day's sermon. Everyone agreed that the priest's sermon on the Holy Spirit had been excellent, but I couldn't join the conversation. I had missed most of it because I had trouble sleeping the night before and fell asleep as soon as the sermon began.

 

Falling asleep during sermons has been a long-standing habit of mine. While attending a Protestant university, I was required to attend chapel services once a week (twice during my freshman year). Each semester, seats were assigned, and theology students checked the attendance record weekly. Missing too many services would affect graduation eligibility, so I couldn't skip them. Most of the preachers were dignified individuals with degrees from prestigious American universities, but few delivered their sermons with the passionate fervor seen on TV or heard on the radio. Their calm, deliberate manner of speaking made it easy to fall asleep. From the moment I entered university, I had to work late nights due to my family's difficult circumstances, leaving me constantly sleep-deprived. Consequently, as soon as the opening hymn ended, I would often drift into sleep. Missing out on the good words of the sermon was less of a concern than the joy of catching up on much-needed sleep.

 

In my sophomore year, I initially tried to stay awake during services because of the girl sitting next to me. She was taller than most boys (about 6 feet, if I recall correctly), beautiful, smart (a pre-med student), and the most famous girl on campus. With such a striking girl beside me, it was hard not to be conscious of her. However, the power of sleep proved stronger than her charm, and no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't fight off the drowsiness. I ended up sleeping next to her for half a year without exchanging a single word. Over the four years of university, I must have attended around 150 services, but I can't remember any of the sermons. Looking back, it is deeply regrettable that I missed all those excellent sermons.

 

While living in the small town of Huntsville, Alabama, I attended an American church since there was no Korean one. Although the sermons were not particularly long, the Southern-accented English was hard to understand, and I often fell into sleep mode as soon as the sermon started, much to the embarrassment of my young daughters. I could understand if I focused, but my old habits from my university days resurfaced. Even now, I sometimes doze off during sermons. This happens the mornings after I've been up all night with leg cramps or pain due to the aftereffects of my accident. I could stay awake if I tried, but I easily succumb to drowsiness. If I had listened diligently to God's word during services and Mass over the years instead of dozing off, my life might have been different. I resolve to stand firm against the attack of sleepiness from now on.